Eden

If you dont like you masturbation sleeve to look graphic this is an AMAZING one. I have only heard great things from this one. it has the two finger holes for grip. (my personal suggestion is for her to use it on him) The finger holes also are the right size for a bullet (i suggest the Rocks off 80mm bullet) and add an extra sensation for him. It is also highly ribbed and feels very real. it is easily turned inside out to clean. Also when he is about to orgasm if you stretch it you suck the orgasm right out of him.

Pregnancy!

Can you still have sex during pregnancy, if so for how long?
As long as you are not a high risk pregnancy or your doctor advises you to hold off on sex it is actually an amazing thing for pregnancy. Orgasms are actually GOOD for the baby, the same hormone that gets sent to your brain when you have one gets sent to the baby making baby happy and less stressed.
You may need to change positions from what you were doing once the belly gets in the way, try different things and have fun with it. It is ok to laugh about it if something doesn't work, don't get frustrated sex is supposed to be fun!

food really can be an aphrodisiacs

it is all in how you eat them and the shapes of the food which makes your mind subconsciously go "there."Also spicy foods increase blood flow which makes your sex drive increase.

Asparagus- the shape and manner in which you eat it, or feed it to your partner brings sex to mind.

Avocado- The Aztecs called an avocado tree "testicle tree" because of how the fruit hang in pairs. 

Banana- by its obvious shape and texture, 

i will post more a couple times a week

Something has been brought to my attention.

I was written by a reader about a subject that i believe a lot of women can relate to! MEN READ THIS!
When a woman says she is almost there, that means what you are doing is working. So when she says this keep doing the same thing. Do not change it up! When you do this she loses the momentum she had built up to the BIG O and this is very frustrating! dont go faster, dont go harder, just keep going!  UNLESS SHE ASKS YOU TO CHANGE IT OR DO IT A DIFFERENT WAY!
thank you
i do respond to you when you have a specific concern or want me to research something for you! also if you want to find the perfect item for your pleasure!

Homework today!

Make time for each other tonight! You know you have 15 minutes to make love and reconnect! (a lot of time that is all it takes) Surprise him and knock him off his feet. Wear some lingerie under your clothes or light that candle! Lets make our husbands happy!

Use the tools of the trade!

I just recently saw this "tool" I have not purchased it but i think it look cool. It is called the Sqweel. It has rotating tongues that give you the feeling of oral sex. It is very easy to clean and to use. It takes 3 triple A batteries. I like the design because it isn't your normal vibration, I am interested in hearing reviews from people who have purchased this.

Foreplay

this is where a lot of communication needs to come in! If you do not talk about it you may never be pleased and it is not your partners fault that they can't read your mind. But you also should be asking what they want! In order to not hurt your husbands ego you should state what you want like this. "I LOVE it when you...." That empowers them knowing they did something that made you happy and it makes them want to do that for you! But foreplay is KEY for girls! It is much easier for a woman to have an orgasm during sex, after she had a clitoral orgasm during foreplay. Women are like a crock pot and men are like a microwave, it takes a while to get most of us to the finish line.

Learn you partners "love language"

People speak the 5 different languages when it comes to showing and receiving love, once you understand and accept your partners language things will become much easier for you in all other aspects of your relationship.
Try to figure out which one you are and which one your partner is.

1. Words of Affirmation
          -If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. If this is your language it is hard for you to let go of things that are said to you good or bad. Hearing the sweet nothings from your love mean the world to you. (writing a poem, singing a song for them, love letters, i love you notes, these things will give you big PLUSES for the people who speak this language)

2.Quality Time
          -Nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful. (this is my love language) A date that gives the both of you a lot of time to just be together is a big plus (going for a walk, going out to dinner, a road trip, a picnic)

3. Receiving Gifts 
          -Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures. (a photo album, a camera with a note saying it is to take pictures of the two of you, any gift with purpose behind it showing that you listen and care.)

4. Acts of Service
          -Do you (or does your significant other) love it when you do chores around the house? Do you find yourself getting more from them and find them happier when you ask what you can do to help out, or do it unasked?  Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.(clean the house or car while they are away leaving notes saying you did it for them, Pick up the dry cleaning, call on your way home from work asking if there is anything that you could do for them on the way home)

5. Physical Touch
          -This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.(when you see this person give them a hug, go for a walk holding hands, when you kiss them touch their cheek softly, console them by touching their arm or letting them cry on your shoulder, when they are talking to you and you want to show you are listening put your hand on their knee)

I hope this helps you learn a little more about your partner, discus each others love languages together and tell talk about how you are going to make one another feel more loved.

What do you wish guys would do?

So one of the nights of the cruise, i posted prior to this one, We are separating the men and women, There will be several things for the ladies like chair dance class and a few other things we have not figured out yet, but for the guys we will be having some sort of group meet and we are trying to decided what it should be focusing on. Here are some examples we came up with, but what would you want your man to work on that would make you more willing to make love to him?
I have to say  we ALL want our men to pitch in more at home and give us the time to feel like sexy women...but would you like him to learn
1) relaxing massage, that would connect the two of you BEFORE hanky panky starts
2) Dress up, just like he wants us in Lingerie and set up a romantic seduction scene or
3) learn to talk to me in a romantic way that makes me want to be more sexual

(that doesn't imply he needs to wear lingerie.....just "PUT SOME EFFORT INTO IT!")

just ideas
if you have an other please write it in we are looking for anything you are wanting or women want in general

Xs and Os is taking a cruise

The X's & O's Lingerie Cruise (soon to be cleverly named) is well underway in the planning stages!! Met w/ Debi King to go over possibilities & brainstorm! Workshop/s offered for the couples, guest speaker/s, SPECIAL GOODIES delivered to enjoy at "bed-time", "Homework assignments" for building/rekindling the flame in the bedroom, etc! Who can say NO to Time Away from the MADNESS of LIFE?

The date will be picked soon it is between Dec 6 (a four day cruise) or Feb 20th (5 day cruise) 

If you are interested or want to hear more i will be posting updates on it while i get them! 

The cruise will include a chair dance lesson by yours truly as well to practice that night with your lover! :)

Guys let the girls finish all of the chores first

A lot of times girls have to much going on in their heads that they can not get into sex! i promise it will be a hundred percent better for you if you let her do the things that she says she needs to get done first. You want her to have a clear mind to focus on only you, make sure the doors are locked stove is off, curling iron is unplugged, the dishes are done, the toys are put away and there is nothing she needs to worry about.

sexy photoshoot

surprise your lover with a sexy photo album! now with printers in almost every household we no longer have to be embarrassed taking intimate photos in or have them possibly confiscated. Use lingerie you already have or use it as an excuse to buy a new set. You can find a photographer who does these but they are usually a little pricey but you can do them yourself and save some money but it is nice to go into a studio and have someone tell you what looks good and has experience with shoots like this but make sure it is someone you are comfortable with or else it will show in the pictures.
Take one of your mans button up shirts so you can do a morning after shot.
Take some costumes along.
Have fun with it and dont be embarrassed he will love them and he will be the one looking at them!

got a facebook

add my pole aerobics fan page and if you are ever in sothern california feel free to take one of my classes! click here

Music sets the mood.

Make a mood CD. It has been proven that music impacts our mood a LOT. For women, we a lot of times set ourselves up for failure in bed and if we start doing things purposefully to put ourselves in the mood then you will have it on your mind and that is half the battle. I dont know why but i LOVE nine inch nails, the lead singers voice automatically puts me in the mood so i listen to my itunes to that the days that i want to be in the mood for my hubby! What is your mood music?

Back Door

It is a subject that not many people discuss. Only 25% of people who have been asked out of over 3400 admitted to performing in ANY form of anal play, this included heterosexual and homosexual relations. only 6% to 8% of couples living together admitted to having anal sex at least once a month.  Believe it or not but some forms of anal stimulation can be beneficial for your health! Males using special adult toys that massage the prostate can promote prostate help and significantly lower your risk for prostate cancer. There are several versions of toys that help with this, the one the most people i have talked to have been pleased with is call the Aneros. The couples don't only say it is beneficial to their health but gives men a different kind of orgasm that they couldnt even explain. So if you are willing to explore this option men, from what many men have said after using this, you will be pleasantly surprised.  talk to you doctor and see if this is right for you. If you have any questions about this subject ask away!

Xs and Os Lingerie and Gift Boutique

I added a picture link to their online store at the bottom of my blog. If there is any product not on the site that you have seen they can order ANYTHING for you. Also there a hundreds more products in the store location than on the website. I believe in this store so much! They really focus on the couple and their needs and CARE about you! They are not just there to make a sale, they educate you on the products because they do not want you to be disappointed. It is so clean and light inside and it was the first adult shop that I did not feel dirty walking into.

Question I Have Been Asked.

Q. Where is my G-Spot and how do i know I have found it?
A. The answer slightly differs from woman to woman but it is about one and a half to two and a half inches into your vagina, behind your pubic bone. The best way to feel it is to put pressure on that spot which many achieve with a "come hither" motion with the fingers or with a G-Spot toy. If while you have done this or while you are having sex you have ever gotten that "oh my gosh i am going to pee" feeling you are hitting the right spot and dont worry the more you do it the less it will feel like a urination feeling, your brain has to adjust to what is going on and no you will not pee. Your body shuts down the ability to urinate while having sex.

Q.What is the Clitoris and where is it?
A. The Clitoris is located at the top of the vagina area and varies in size but is normally pea sized and covered by the "clitoral hood" The sole purpose of the clitoris is for pleasure. Most girls find it much easier to achieve a clitoral orgasm than a G-Spot orgasm which can be achieved by manual/gentle stimulation of the skin, tongue, or a vibrator.

Q.What are nipples supposed to look like?
A. Nipples come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. Some are inverted, or stand erect, and some women have one of each. Some are pink, brown, or even tan. The most important thing is if they start to change in appearance of become sore or have any discharge that isnt supposed to be there you need to go see your doctor.

Q.Are clitoral and penis pumps safe?
A.Yes, when used properly, not everyone is comfortable with using them and they are not a necessity but they can be used to enhance pleasure.

Go on a "vacation"

Even if you are just going to a hotel down the street it is good to break out of the norm and going somewhere new. Turn off your phones and make to room romantic, rose petals, candles, bubble bath, champagne. You could even break out the wedding dress and have a wedding night DO OVER! Have fun with it! I dont know about you but the wedding night isnt always what you build yourself up to hoping it is but you CAN make a new memory! Pretend you are far away and let people think you are out of town and keep that DO NOT DISTURB sign on your door :)

X's and O's Home Party (new info)

Ladies in the San Diego/LA area!!
Any occasion is a good one to have an X's and O's party! If you like to have fun and learn about many different adult products and feel them to see the difference! We also have tons of sexy lingerie! Also our number one product for military wives (Clone a Willie)

-Great prices!!!

-we have thousands of products that we do carry and we can order any product you wish to purchase

-We can come to you or you can come to out store location in Escondido for your party

-the hostess or the bride to be gets product worth 10% of the purchases made at the party.

-The hostess gets her choice of 10% off he purchase or a free pole aerobics class

-Anyone who makes a purchase of $100 dollars or more gets a free pole aerobics class

-If you make a purchase of $25 or more you receive a lifetime %15 off our products

-We ship for free (if we have to order outside of what we have)

If you have any questions or want to book your party let me know, you can either write me in the feed but you will get a faster response if you email me at Usanavictoria@yahoo.com

condoms

Condoms are very affective against both pregnancy and STD's but only when used properly. The main cause of condom failure is not breakage but improper use of them. There are different shapes and sizes for a reason and purchasing different types to try them on and see the best fit may be embarrassing and cost a a little money but it will be more embarrassing and expensive if you get a girl pregnant or catch a disease. If you use a condom that is too big it can slip off, too small and it can break. Learn how to properly put on a condom because if put on wrong it can cause the same problems. Be careful and be safe. of course this is for those who are not wanting to get pregnant and/or are wanting to protect themselves or their partner from an STD.